These Things Which Test Us
by Amber6
Summary: What if Leo knew of Paige's existance all along?


  
  
ucenterThese Things Which Test Us/u/center  
  
  
Those questions she knew would come, asked in a respectful but hurried manner, regarding flower arrangements and psalms and did your sister have any connections with the church? Piper knew what he meant; did someone have to write a prompting card for the vicar, covered with useful, heart-warming facts of donations and fund-raising activities? She shook her head quickly, eager to get rid of the man, his sympathetic smile put on to aid the ease of his job, his hand too close for comfort on her rigid shoulder. Finally he left, his questions having found answers, Piper's heart breaking with each one, so alone in a room crowded with people and their continuous, overlapping chatter.   
  
The funeral passed slowly and with too many thoughts; Phoebe and Leo on either side of Piper, his hand gripping hers tightly, white knuckles cold and bare against the dead heat of the church. Against her will her head raced with too many painful memories, and Piper heard nothing of the vicar's speech or epitaph, as images played across her eyes, too vivid against the dull ache of grief.  
  
iYour head snapped back, the invisible blow from the Source himself knocking you from the air, your body clattering hard against dead sand, dust kicked up in spirals from the ground, settling yellow against the black of your trousers. Phoebe cowered behind me, wincing at each kick, the look of determination on your face still strong and defiant. Your body seeped fluids, blood and sweat mixing together, your face smeared with the blood of the Source himself, his mignons having scattered and fled. Your eyes burned black at his, fists up, stance of no fear. You were facing your own death, and you wouldn't let us help. With a lightening fast manoeuvre, his legs whipped round your waist, a sickening iCRACK/i echoing through the crypt as your back broke in two, bile rising in my throat and blood thumping to my ears. Your head flopped backwards, eyes vacant and hollow, tongue hanging drunkenly from your parted lips. Your last breaths taken, your last words screamed defiantly just seconds earlier; "I love you! I'm doing this for me! Stay back!" And we knew we had to, and that all we could do was to take you home./i  
  
The coffin looked too small, it's dark mahogany sheen glinting against the rays of sun, filtering colour through stained glass window, squares of red and blue and yellow playing off pale faces and sweating palms. Subconsciously, Piper convinced herself Prue was too big for the box, so full of life, each day approached bravely and without fear. The priest's words meant nothing to her, and she did not hear them, her eyes firmly planted on the golden plague; Prue Halliwell, RIP.   
  
The choir boys, their angelic faces, eight years old and introduced to death too soon. Dressed in clean smocks, handwashed by their mothers, their voices echoed through the church, heads held high, each gripping a candle to symbolise the eternal flame of life. It hurt her too much; these people who didn't know Prue, speaking about her as if she was a best friend, whom they will miss her terribly and but try to face life without. Piper glanced fearfully around her, past the rosy red cheeks of choir boys, past the pallbearers with the coffin, past the faces glancing cautiously at her. Finally her eyes found their objective; a happy smile, dark strands of hair falling before a face, a golden frame around an image. Prue's face, Prue's picture, that reassuring smile. And it brought Piper more comfort than the hand of her husband, or the words of the priest, or the bundles of plastic wrapped flowers and heartfelt greeting cards.   
  
His eyes were on her, she could feel concerned green flecks watching her every move, full of love and worry. His hand, clasped as ever around her own, so the point where she doubted they were still two separate people. But in the back of her mind Piper processed a memory, repeatedly going over it, vivid as a clear blue sky.  
  
i"I'm going after her." Prue stated defiantly. "I'm not letting my little sister die or reign as evil down there. Phoebe's coming home." She looks over to me, where I stand with Leo. "Piper, honey........ I love you." She takes my hands in her own, looking me straight in the eyes. "I have to do this, I have to go get Phoebe back." Her hand cups my cheek. "I promise you, you'll have Phoebe, sweetie, okay?" I nod dumbly. I know whatever I say cannot stop her; Prue is too determined, too committed to this family. She will do anything to save us. Anything. And I know that. I am relying on him, that he will stop her.  
  
"Leo, can you orb me down there?" his eyes flicker before her own. I am waiting for his response.  
  
'No, it's too dangerous. Phoebe did what she did for you guys, she wanted to. I won't let you go down there, Prue. You won't come back.' His words play through my head.  
  
Instead he answers her in the positive, without the slightest quiver or pause tainting his voice. "Okay." Nothing more, just 'okay'. Can't he see the fear in my eyes? Doesn't he know what Prue is planning? Can't he see the resolve written across her face, the determination to save Phoebe at all costs?/i  
  
The box is lowered slowly to the ground, long green straps taking Prue to her final resting place. Piper stood to the side, tears storming down her cheeks, Phoebe's head buried in her shoulder. Her salty tears streamed through the thin fabric of Piper's dress, soaking her shoulder. But she felt nothing, too many memories flooding her mind to notice minor details. Leo's arm encircled both girls, as the priest's words trembled through particles of air and reached mourners, black clothes worn respectably and waterproof mascara protecting them from a humiliation. The box thumped against soft earth, six feet below the surface, the straps placed carefully upon the ground to be removed once the congregation had departed.   
  
But at the sound, that final, heart rendering ithump/i, Piper's heart surged, ripping through a resolve to remain strong as the finality of the situation hit her hard and fast. The summer heat and gently chirping birds shrunk away from the congregation as Piper's high pitched scream cut sharply through thick air.  
  
center***/center  
  
"Miss Krasker?" the woman's light blonde locks flew around the door, green eyes gazing expectantly at Paige. The latter waved her hand vaguely towards the door, eyes fixated on the screen of her computer, blue sparkling at the new ideas other leading psychiatrists were continuously posting to her through the internet. Reluctantly she finished the paragraph, before turning her head, and grinning broadly at her new assistant.  
  
"Nicole. Yes. Sorry, this is just fascinating!" Paige laughed lightly, her reddish brown locks dancing before her eyes, before they were gently tucked behind her ears. Paige Krasker loved her job, and as one of the best known child psychiatrists in Los Angeles, she was in a comfortable position. The LA skyline adorned the external walls of her office, especially chosen by Paige so her patients would feel less restricted.  
  
"Mayuko Tsichari is here, your eleven o'clock?" Paige glanced briefly at her schedule, chewing on her bottom lip as she remembered the little girl's last session. Extremely close to her parents, both had been tragically killed in a plane crash over Japan the previous month. Mayuko had scraped through with her own life; multiple leg fractures and spinal injuries meant she was paralysed from the waist down permanently. The little girl was a pitiful sight, but her determination and refusal to feel sorry for herself was as touching as it was inspiring.   
  
Paige grabbed the eight year old's file from the cabinet, tied her hair back quickly in a high ponytail, and followed Nicole out the office, a genuine grin on her face as Mayuko's smile peaked out from behind casts and bandaids, so instantly that the wheelchair disappeared. At the sight of her, Paige could easily have forgotten the child needed counselling at all.  
  
An hour had passed quickly, with Mayuko keen to talk of her recovery, each removed cast and disappearing bruise a trophy in creating a new life for herself. She spoke fluently, wore lovely clothes, traditional Japanese dresses and embroided skirts. Her eyes had regained a sparkle, her hair shone. To anyone else, the little girl would have seemed like a normal child, happy and fulfilled. But not to Paige. Underneath the layers of genuine happiness, she was still hurting, weeping inside, weeping for a lost mother and father, a torn childhood, horrifying images still playing through her head.   
  
"Mayuko....." Paige began gently. "Sweetie, can you tell me about your parents?" Instantly a grin disappeared, eyes were cast downwards. Paige tried to prompt her.  
  
"Sweetie, just tell me.... what was your Mommy's name?"  
  
A whispered response. "Ayano."  
  
"And Daddy? Sweetie, what was Daddy's name?"  
  
"Daddy's name was Yuki." She could hear the grief thick through the little girl's voice; she was drowning in it, drowning amongst memories and images, a thousand missed goodnights, bedtime stories left unread, as the world continued on. But the world did not have Mayuko back. Not yet.  
  
"What did you and Mommy and Daddy used to do together?"  
  
Mayuko's head lifted up, her eyes swimming with tears, tears left uncried for too long. Grief bottled up, stored, until a time like this, where it would spill over, finally release itself as sobs, entangled with burbled words and memories.   
  
"We used to go to the park." Mayuko choked through sobs, using the palm of her hand to wipe them away. "And Daddy would push me on the swing, and Mommy would sit and watch and take pictures. She was a photographer." She continued proudly, tears raining down her cheeks. "And we'd take bread for the ducks, and we'd all feed them."  
  
Paige nodded, and handed Mayuko a tissue. "Do you ever speak about Mommy and Daddy, Mayuko? With Grandma or Grandpa?"  
  
The child paused briefly, before gentle weeping turned into heavy sobbing, echoing through the room. "It hurts, Paige. It hurts lots. It hurts them too. I don't go to see the ducks anymore."  
  
Paige's heart surged for the weeping child before her. "Would you like to, sweetie? Would you like to feed the ducks again?" Mayuko's black bangs bounced across her tiny face as she nodded.  
  
She looked up excitedly. "Can you take me, Paige? Can we go see the ducks?" Her eyes lit up once again. It ripped through Paige's heart; she would have loved to take Mayuko, to have heard her laughing, to have seen a smile that didn't mean another bandage had been removed. But it would only mean the little girl would get too attached to her. The idea of the sessions was primarily to get Mayuko to talk about her parents, to enable her to move on with her new life, to be able to speak with her grandparents.   
  
"I can't do that, sweetheart. That's not what I'm here for." Paige walked slowly across the room, before kneeling so her eyes matched Mayuko's level. "Could you ask Grandma to take you, d'you think? I bet she'd like to, you know." The face before Paige's became thoughtful, as Mayuko debated this latest challenge.  
  
"Okay Paige." A tiny hand closed over her eyes, as gentle, clammy fingers traced her face. She couldn't help but grin. Children are creatures of uninhibition, innocent and unembarrassed. Paige had chosen Child Psychiatry for those exact reasons; the inhibition adults carry with them prevents real opening up, real truths. They do not say what they want to, for fear of humiliation or reprimanding. Children are unique, special creatures. They will speak, really speak, tell Paige exactly what they were thinking, and the sense of satisfaction which struck her as each child walked from her office one last time, a smile adorning their lips, was what made Paige love her job. She could help the people who most needed her.  
  
"Okay sweetie. And can you do one more thing for me?" Mayuko nodded slowly. "I want you to try and speak about Mommy and Daddy to your grandparents. Just a little bit, everyday." Mayuko swallowed visibly, brown eyes burning into Paige's.   
  
"Okay."  
  
"Okay. Now......." Paige glanced at her watch. "Our hour's nearly up, honey, is there anything else you wanted to talk about?" Mayuko grinned and shook her head.  
  
"I'm okay. Wednesday, right?"  
  
"Right." Paige smiled mischievously, tickling Mayuko gently over her stomach. The little girl grinned and giggled wildly, squirming and trying to dodge Paige's hands. The giggling continued until finally Paige gave her mercy, still wriggling and smiling broadly.  
  
"Okay, kiddo, lets go." Paige held the door open for Mayuko as she bravely wheeled herself out. From the far corner of the waiting room, the child's grandparents stood, expectantly glancing at Paige. She smiled reassuringly, iShe's getting better./i She watched the small family as they departed the room, Mayuko grinning with her grandfather, and the question Paige wanted to hear reached her ears.  
  
"Can we go and feed the ducks at the pond? Please?"  
  
Paige smiled softly, and retreated once again to her office, to write up Mayuko's notes and assess where they should go next. She wouldn't need many more sessions, Paige could see that; the little girl was determined to move on with her life, and had never refused to talk about anything Paige suggested. As the words appeared on her computer screen, iIs now ready to talk about relationship with parents in more detail; has begun to bring them up at home also./i, Paige couldn't help but drift her mind back to her own childhood.  
  
She had always known she had been adopted; it was never a secret, she did not suddenly find out on her sweet sixteenth, or eighteenth. Her adoptive parents had loved her as their own, unable to have children naturally. They had given her everything she had ever wanted, sent her to university, provided homecoming and prom dresses, entertained ideas of moving to Europe. But still, at the back of her mind, were the nagging questions; Who are my real mom and dad? Why did they give me up? Where are they now? The package she had received from the adoption agency when Paige had turned eighteen did little to answer her questions; simply stating her biological mother and father had lived in San Francisco at the time of Paige's birth, and had not been married. Now, aged 23, Paige wanted to find her family; Brothers? Sisters? What were they like? How old were they? Did she look like them? The questions rattled through her mind, and the computer screen in front of her disappeared in a void of daydreaming of meeting them, of the older sister she'd always wanted, of the first words she'd say.  
  
A phone call brought her quickly to her senses, jolting Paige from the reverie she found herself in, an abrupt RING!!! RING!!! causing her to jump. She picked up the phone, held it to her ear, and drummed out the greeting automatically.  
  
"Paige Krasker, Child Psychiatrist. How can I help you?"  
  
A male voice she had never heard before answered her, a grin visible through his words. "Paige? My name's Leo Wyatt. I have some information about your family that may be of interest to you."  
  
center***/center  
  
Four weeks had passed since the funeral, each day spent busily rushing around, completing chores that could wait, filling in paperwork for P3 that didn't need to be done until the following month. Wordlessly Leo sat and watched as Piper once again dusted numerous ornaments and knick knacks, vacuumed, edited documents that were already perfect. Phoebe came home from college, and immediately started a paper that she had weeks to finish.   
  
Leo sat and read their eyes, seeing the invisible tears that weren't yet cried, saw the memories playing out in their minds. It was still too early, but he knew he had to tell them the secret he had held for too long. Without the Power of Three the girls were too vulnerable, too easy a target for the latest warlock or demon. He could delay no longer; They would not let him.  
  
He cleared his throat deliberately, cutting through the thick tension which hung permanently in the air, knocking a few bricks from the wall Piper and Phoebe had build tightly around themselves.   
  
"Piper, Phoebe, have you..um... thought about what you're going to do now?" Piper looked at her husband briefly, directly, and then answered, blank and too neutral.  
  
"I have to finish this, then go to the club for opening. And Phoebe..." she glanced to her sister. "Want to come help?" Phoebe gave a small smile.   
  
"Sure, why not."  
  
Leo's mind raced and he wet his lips nervously. "Um, that wasn't what I meant. I meant about the Power of Three." He watched both girl's reactions intently, as each gazed upon the floor as though it was a work of art to be marvelled at. He pressed bravely on. "With Prue...gone..... you only have the power of two now. You're not strong enough to ward off the demons you have in the past. It was your bond as sisters that made you so strong."  
  
Phoebe met Leo's eyes. "We still have a sisterly bond, Leo. Piper and I iare/i sisters, you know."   
  
"I know that, Phoebe. But out of all of you, Prue was the strongest. Her power was the most important one in the Power of Three, and as the oldest sister she received it." He could sense the walls being built again, banishing talk of Prue and demons, building emotional barriers even Leo could not break through. Piper and Phoebe sat at the dining room table, in high backed chairs, with blank looks adorning their faces. Leo crouched uncomfortably on the edge of a sofa, unsure of how to say what he had to; of how to phrase the most shocking revelation of the sister's lives.  
  
"I'm sorry, there's something I have to tell you. It can't wait any longer, it has to be said now. And it's going to hurt." Piper looked edgy, her eyes darting frantically to a safe haven, where she could block out thoughts of Prue if she didn't want to think about her elder sister. Phoebe's eyes simply looked, concerned, towards Piper, confusion tracing through them both. Leo silently got up and took both their hands, and they reluctantly allowed him to lead them into the sitting room, the two sisters subconsciously realising they had to listen to him, not as a husband or brother in law, but as a representative of Them.  
  
The three sat down, so once again Piper and Phoebe faced Leo squarely. He met both their gazes equally, and begun with the story he knew he was obliged to tell them.  
  
"Your mom had an affair with her whitelighter, Sam. You ....you both know that." He began cautiously, now far past the point of no return, a mere glimpse on the horizon, too far gone to ever turn back. Piper's eyes widened in confusion, so much that Leo desperately wanted to go to her and hug her and tell her everything was going to be okay. He hated this; the knowledge that whatever he said now would hurt her, something he had promised himself he would never do.  
  
Phoebe nodded, seemingly more open to the idea. "But, Leo..." she began hesitantly, wrapping her hand around Piper's. "What has this got to do with the Power Of Three?"  
  
Leo took a deep breath and swallowed visibly. He had reached the hardest part, the part where there was no point in delaying the inevitable by dancing around words or stalling; he had to give it to them straight. "Your mom fell pregnant with Sam's child, but it was an unusual pregnancy and she didn't know she was pregnant until she was in labour. She was rushed to hospital, where she gave birth to a baby girl. Your mom named her Paige." Leo burbled out quickly, his eyes never leaving his panic stricken wife's. Piper was visibly shaking now, her eyes flickering from Phoebe's to Leo's. Finally words came to her.  
  
"We.... we have another sister?" She rubbed shivering, goosepimpled hands over her face. "Is that what you're saying, Leo?"  
  
He nodded slowly, taking in Piper's reaction as Phoebe sat, merely shell-shocked. "The Elders stripped the baby of her powers. The child; she wasn't fate, it was never meant to happen. We're... we're supposed to have the first child with witch's and whitelighter's powers, Piper." Leo glanced, worried, at his wife. She was taking this less well than she had hoped, with wild eyes and looks of betrayal in all directions. Still he continued; she was already hurting, she deserved the whole story. "The Elders forbade your Mom from keeping her, and she knew it would make things awkward for the three of you, with your impending fates. So she put Paige up for adoption. She regretted it for the next six months, before she died. She hated herself for not giving you three the chance to meet your little sister, she hated the Elders for stripping the girl of her powers. She died before she had the chance to rectify the mistake she made, and Sam was too grief stricken to be capable of looking after his daughter, so he left her where she was, thinking it to be better for Paige."  
  
The silence hung in the air, thick and choking, louder than any sound could have been. Piper's eyes flickered before Leo, attempting to process the information, trying to ask one of the thousand questions which flew in a frenzy around her head. Finally one surfaced, spluttering over betrayal, grief and disbelief.  
  
"Where is she now?"  
  
"Still in Los Angeles, where she grew up."  
  
Los Angeles.. it was so close..... the ideas and missed opportunities crashed and collided and brought home the truth to Piper.  
  
"How long have you known about her, Leo? I mean, how long have you known she's existed?"  
  
Her words stormed through him; this was the worst part, the possibly unforgivable part. This was the part which would either make or break their marriage. Phoebe sat, open mouthed, hearing none of it, the ideas and questions flooding and engulfing her, her ears too blocked with unspoken reveries.  
  
"I've been training her in her powers for four weeks. She received them after ..... after..." his voice trailed off, knowing he was avoiding Piper's question, as her eyes burned betrayal and hurt through him, realising his answer before it was spoken. A whisper torched the air.  
  
"You've always known about her, haven't you?" her voice was thick with his breach of trust, with shock, reality jarring through her. Piper stood quickly, her eyes fixed on Leo's. "Haven't you, right from the start, right from the second she was born, you've known about her," Piper's voice suddenly rose from a whisper, her shout consuming air, eating into every hidden crack. "HAVEN'T YOU?"  
  
Her words hung in the air, waiting for an answer, in truth knowing it, but wanting to hear the words spoken. Leo met her gaze, and whispered the word she didn't want to hear.  
  
"Yes." The one syllable shivered through particles of air, colliding with her ears, sending visible jolts through her as his betrayal rocked her very soul. With one last look of pure torment, of hurt and confusion, reverted back to the helplessness of childhood, Piper stormed from the room, the very air parting to let her through.  
  
Feet stomped on the stairs, an awkward cry, followed by tragic, heart rendering sobbing.   
  
A slammed bedroom door, heavy woods colliding, ricocheting through the old manor. Leo glanced at Phoebe, who through shock and disbelief had found herself again, and understood at least in part the reasons for Leo's lack of honesty.  
  
"Go after her, honey. She needs you. Whether she knows it or not."  
  
A grim smile, hands on thighs as he stood up. Leo ruffled Phoebe's hair as he walked past her. "I'm sorry." He whispered, above the echoing sobs and terrifying silence.  
  
center***/center  
  
His feet fell heavily on the stairs, each one climbed, a step towards his wife, hurting because of him. Finally Leo reached their bedroom door, his breathing heavy and laboured from adrenaline, heart pounding in his chest cavity. He had no notion of what he was going to say, no idea how to rectify this mistake, how to regain Piper's trust or love. Her choking sobs caused a dull ache in his heart, the ache of guilt mixed with supreme self hate. His very fingers tingled uncontrollably, and as Leo knocked softly on the door, tears of guilt stung his eyes as he blinked them away.  
  
"Piper?" he called softly, longing to hold her, kiss her hair lovingly, block out the hurt which consumed her. The hurt of losing a sister, of a husband's betrayal, of a secret she was unsure of how to react to. On the other side of the door, Piper's heart leapt in her chest as tears streamed uncontrollably down her cheeks. She hugged a pillow to her face, trying to block out the pain of Leo's dishonesty. But it brought no avail, and through choked sobs she screamed at him.  
  
"Go away!" And she meant it. She couldn't see Leo right now, see the green eyes she loved so much, hear his kind voice explaining away things which she couldn't forgive at present. She wanted to be angry at him, needed to hate him, not feel his arms tightly around her or lips sending kisses into her hair.   
  
But the door opened, his beloved form on the opposite side, still standing in the hall as the heavy wooden door clattered against the wall. His heart longed to run to her, to block out the pain coursing through her, whispers sweet nothings in her ear as he had done a thousand times before. But the barriers between them grew with each word he spoke, with each tear that fell from her glistening eyes.  
  
Her voice unexpectantly cut the air. "Why didn't you tell us sooner? Why couldn't you tell us?"  
  
He knew she'd hate his answer before it reached the tip of his tongue, before his tongue met his teeth to form the first word. Her eyes refused to meet his, shining beneath layers of emotions colliding; trust with dishonesty, love with hate. Her cheeks were red with the continuous rubbing and wiping away of tears, her hair tousled and matted.   
  
"They wouldn't let me. It's a rule, I couldn't tell you because it would have affected decisions you made, it would have disrupted the Power of Three. I asked Them, They said...."  
  
His words coursed through Piper, sickened her, ripping up self pity and crying, replaced with anger and bitter resentment of Them. Inside she exploded, weeks of animosity towards Them engulfing her, of taking away Prue, of springing this latest surprise twenty two years too late.  
  
"Damn the ifucking/i rules, Leo, I'M YOUR WIFE!" she screamed, the pillow thrown weakly towards the door. "THIS IS YOUR FAMILY!" Piper spat the words, splatters of saliva wetting the air. "If you feel you have more of a duty to them than you do do to me, to us, then maybe you should ......." she had no more words, no more insults, her point put across. She shook, crying. He made no attempt to comfort her, knowing it would only hurt her more.  
  
"You've know, all this time, and you did NOTHING? You never ionce/i even tried to tell us, we had a RIGHT TO KNOW, LEO!" She continued, and he took it all, because he knew he deserved this; screaming, shouting, her words tearing the air, mixed with frantic sobbing. She was right, he knew that now; all three should have been told years ago. But there was nothing that could be done except let Piper say what she wanted, and hope she would eventually forgive him.   
  
"It's always going to be like this, isn't it?" Piper whispered, her bloodshot eyes finally meeting his, brown sparking with flecks of love licked with hate and betrayal. But the love was still there. "You, obeying Them. At their beck and call twenty four hours a day. How many other siblings do we have out there, Leo? How many more secrets are you keeping from us?"  
  
Finally Leo made an attempt to move into the room, needing to be closer to her to explain his actions better. "I promise, Piper.." he began softly. "On Prue's grave, that there are no more secr..."  
  
"DON'T YOU iDARE!"/i Piper screamed manically, rising quickly. "Don't you fucking dare swear on her grave! She wouldn't have a grave if you weren't here!" Her sobs broke cleanly through the air, echoing down the hallway. "She would be right here if it weren't for you, if you had just told her you wouldn't take her....." Finally she had said it, told him what she had been thinking for so many weeks. His face screwed up in shock, confusion, disbelief. Her words tore through him and he knew exactly how she was feeling.  
  
The silence crowded the air, surrounding the pair of them as hurt met hurt and confusion met betrayl. The tension was viscous, breathing difficult, as eyes flickered at each other under a blanket of emotions.  
  
Finally, he spoke, his words trembling in the air. His heart went out to her but it hurt too much to attempt a reconciliation. Time and space was all that was left.  
  
"And Phoebe wouldn't." The familar blue orbs surrounded him, his hurt eyes burning at Piper until the last blue sparkle disappeared, circling and trailing light through the room.  
  
Piper watched silently as the last light flickered and disappeared, tracing across the ceiling. With her head held high and heart still thundering in her chest, she collapsed on the bed in fits of tears, each drop crying out for Leo at the same time as another hated him. Her very being shook with the emotions flooding her head, her heart tore and heartstrings pulled her in a thousands directions.   
  
Outside, the heavens opened, rain falling and splattering hard against the windows of the silent manor, bringing it to life as water torrented from the skies. Heaven's tears, as it weeped for a perfection parted.  
  
center***/center  
  
Hours became days, days dissolved into weeks. Hurt and pain dulled, but words still echoed around both their heads, words spat and meant, screamed.   
  
Leo continued with his Paige and his other charges, training her in her three powers; telekinisis, astral projection and her whitelighter power of healing. With each day she grew stronger, establishing new tactics, new ideas, learning how to use her powers to the best of her ability. Any other situation and the witch's skill would have pleased and satisfied Leo, but with his mind too focused on his broken marriage and the pain coursing across Piper's face that night, he felt no pleasure as Paige progressed to more advanced levels. And with Piper's outburst playing in his ears, Leo knew she would not take him back. Not yet. She had to make the first move, so he stayed where he was.   
  
Piper blocked out thoughts of Leo, concentrating once again on the club and the manor. The hours crawled by, mocking her, as each kind word Leo had ever murmured in her ear played again and again through her head, until she was sure she could feel his hot breath warming her neck, spiked fringe tickling under her chin. But still his betrayal rocked her, scared her. iHow many more secrets is he keeping from me?/i And with thoughts of the two sisters she had lost flooding her brain constantly, Piper made no attempt at a reconciliation, her mind still too unsure of Leo's loyalty to his family.   
  
Three weeks had passed, each day seeping by slowly, the minutes passing as hours and hours as days. The last customer left P3 with some assistance, and Piper sighed as her eyes surveyed the scene. The bar was littered with glasses, crisp packets, rings of split drink gleaming in the blue light. She leaned wearily on the bar, head in her hands, longing to just go home and burying herself under a blanket.   
  
After several minutes, Piper forced herself up, sighing as she turned to the cash register to deposit the $5 note the drunken customer had attemped to slip down her top. She no longer enjoyed her job, unless Phoebe decided to join her, and her sister's enthusiasm had waned after the first week. Piper longed to have the three of them at the bar again, Prue and Phoebe laughing softly, Leo's hands clasping her own.  
  
A triangle of white caught Piper's eye as grabbed her bag from under the cash register, glinting in the eerie, barely lit club. She pulled it out, stubborn to shift, from under the bar unit, and turned it over.  
  
Smiling faces leapt out at her, big white cheesy grins, his arms around her waist and head resting on her shoulder. Her hand raised towards the camera, newly placed engagement ring gleaming and sparkling. Taken at the restaurant the day Leo had proposed, her hair in a half ponytial, long and shining. His frame perfectly complimented by his choice of simple white t-shirt and smart dinner jacket. Her brown eyes glinting with flecks of happiness.   
  
And her heart sank in her chest, crying out for his.  
  
Leo shifted awkwardly on the thin, worn through mattress, as springs popped out the sides on the bed, twinging and twanging with every move he made. Tossing and turning for three hours, but inside he knew the mattress and unfamiliar surroundings were barely to blame. Each time he dropped close to sleep he would reach out to his left, feeling the cold empty space and bare blanket, no familar lump of body, no tousled hair, no gentle lulling breath. No Piper.  
  
He turned over, sighing loudly, fiddling in the dark for the switch on the lamp. Leo pushed himself up, rubbing his eyes, groaning as light dots stained his vision. He felt blindly for his wallet, unfastening the catch with his eyes still closed, pulling out the dog eared photo he kept in there at all times. Finally he opened his eyes, the sight before him stealing away Leo's breath. Her perfectly formed hairstyle, each lock of brown velvet in it's correct position. He could still smell her now; the musky scent of her perfume, vanilla and dried flowers, perfectly complimenting the fresh ocean scent of her hair. The engagement ring on her displayed finger, shimmering in the light.  
  
And he knew he would not sleep that night, for he would not be beside her.  
  
center***/center  
  
Their mumurings filled her ears, sitting in a bright pool of light just metres from the ten men. Her sister's crying echoed throughout the room, magnified from Earth, each sob complete and whole, causing her heart to leap and jump in her chest. Prue watched as each face jolted with the tears, each sentence interrupted as Piper's grief spilled into their hearts. And she knew her request would be permitted.  
  
Ten heads turned towards her, ten saddned faces, as hers stood strong and determined. "Can I go?" she asked firmly, her voice deafening, breaking the continuous flow of sobbing and sniffling. Ten heads nodded somberly, twenty saddened eyes meeting Prue's own. One man stood and bravely spoke over the din of weeping.   
  
"We understand the joining of Piper and Leo was fate, a subsequent life in a string of lifetimes together, forever bound by their souls. The recent turn of events was not fate; your death and Leo's minor unavoidable role in that has altered the way of things down on Earth. The two were never meant to be parted, and as your sister we believe only you can put this right. We grant you leave of the heavens for an Earth hour to return there to try and put right this wrong." The man gave Prue a small smile.   
  
Gold danced around her, engulfing her world, until the Elders had disappeared behind glowing balls of shimmering gold and silver, too beautiful for Prue to dare blink, dancing in and out and before her eyes with such precision and accuracy.  
  
center***/center  
  
Too soon she was at the manor, seeing Piper's shoulders shake with heavy sobs, wretching with a broken heart. Prue's heart wept for her sister, so distraught over losing her, alone in the harsh reality of life.  
  
Piper sat on her bed, blanket wrapped around her shoulders, staring intently at the photograph which lay in her hands. A week had passed since she'd found it, today signalling a month since Leo had last orbed out of her life forever. The happy faces, gleaming from within, a frozen image of a moment in time when she had never been happier. Now, a point when she had never been sadder, with fat tears rolling down her cheeks and hopeless cries echoing from her stomach.  
  
icenterThe old picture on the shelf  
Well it's been there for a while  
A frozen image of ourselves  
We are acting like a child  
Innocent and in a trance  
A dance that lasted for a while/i/center  
  
Slowly she took the photo between two hands, staring long and hard at his face one last time, mermerising each pore and crinkle of skin, each speckle of green in his eyes. Her fingers traced over the face she loved so much, over his eyes, his nose, his ear to ear grin. Slowly, her fingers moved to rip it in half.  
  
"Piper! Don't!"  
  
She tensed, paused mid action, terrified to turn around, terrifed to see who stood behind her. Petrified beyond belief that the voice was in her head, not filling the room, trembling through particles of air to reach her ears. Piper took a deep breath, relaxed her shoulders and slowly turned, her eyes locked ahead of her. The golden orbs disappeared, each flickering gradually away, revealing Prue, standing with her hand to her mouth, eyes wide, pure liquid pools of guilt and awe. The two sisters merely looked at each other, staring, each mesmerised by the sight of the other.  
  
"P..P...Prue?" Piper gasped, her eyebrows nearing her eyes, shivers shooting up and down her spine. Her hands literally shook as they clutched, white knuckled, on to the cotton blanket. Prue's hand left her mouth momentarily, a whispered reply sparking the air.  
  
"It's me, Piper."  
  
A cry escpaed Piper's lips, high pitched, as she scrambled over the bed, layers of unmade sheets and covers slowing her up. "Prue! Prue oh thank god......" her arms wrapped tight around her sister's frame, silent weeps of joy flooding her cheeks. Prue's strong form, Prue's gentle, simple scent, Prue's motherly, loving words.  
  
center***/center   
  
"But how? Why?" Piper questioned quietly several minutes later, her head stilll gently resting on Prue's shoulder as if she was seven years old all over again, with her big sister telling her made up stories of witches and angels.  
  
But now she knew it was real.  
  
"I know about you and Leo, sweetie. They've sent me down here, I asked them to. I know about Paige now, too." Prue leaned back so her eyes met Piper's, matching mascara lines smeared down their cheeks. "I'm real again for an hour; I needed to talk to you, I never had the chance to say goodbye."  
  
"An hour?" It ws never enough time; Piper had too much to say to Prue, too many echoes of love and thanks to be squeezed into a lifetime, let alone an hour. "Prue... an hour? That's not enough time, I have things to tell you, things I need to say, I...."  
  
"Piper...." Prue's hands enveloped her younger sisters. "Honey, I know all of it. I do, believe me. Everything you think you need to tell me, it's all in here." She reached up and brushed the left side of her chest, eyes shimmering. "You've been telling me everything since the moment you learned to talk, kiddo. We don't need to go over ground that's already been trodden on again, if we both know what the turf is like." Piper's eyes met her sister's, for the first time in weeks not crying or weeping, or echoing heavy sobs. Just shining with life.  
  
"I love you." She wasn't going without saying that, no matter how much Prue knew it. They smiled together.  
  
"I know sweetie. I love you too."  
  
Prue shifted her weight on the bed so she sat crossed legged in front of Piper. Their eyes locked, memories of a thousand converstaions of how to talk to boys and anecdotes of first kisses swarming their memories, allowing each to laugh softly, safe in the knowledge the other was thinking the same. Finally Prue knew she had to start.  
  
"Piper, it wasn't Leo's fault, what happened. To me, I mean. I know you're blaming him, and you're both aching because of it; both hurting. I can feel his pain now, Piper, he needs you. He needs like like you need him."   
  
Piper hugged her knees to her chest, so her chin rested on top of them and her eyes stared intently into Prue's, trying to memerise every detail, every minor hair out of place, each spot of patchy foundation, each sparkle of blue adorning her eyes. "I did what I had to do, Piper. You and Phoebe; you were more than sisters, you were like kids I never had, especially when we were young and mom wasn't here. I couldn't just leave Phoebe down there, you know me. I'm too stubborn for my own good." Prue glanced down. "It was never Leo's fault, Piper. You know that, honey. Deep down you know that even if he had refused to orb me down there, I would have found a way. I'd do anything for you guys."  
  
"Prue, you.... you.." a sob escaped briefly from Piper's throat, but she forced the lump down. "You idied/i for us, for her. You're gone, and I can't just pick myself up, I can't move on, Prue. You were the mother we never had; you read us stories and tucked us in at night, made sure we were smart for school. You died for us, Prue. I know Leo couldn't of stopped you; I just... I just wish he'd tried, wished you weren't so stubborn." She cracked a small grin, before it quickly disappeared as another worry emerged. "And I don't want to just move on, replace you with Paige, just so we can have the Power of Three again. It isn't right."  
  
The afternoon sunlight filtered through the room, caressing skin, warming and soothing away the dry salt tracks of tears which had adorned Piper's cheeks for so long. She was so tired of crying, tired of missing Leo, knowing now more than ever that in truth he could not have stopped Prue. iBut what about Paige?/i iWhy did he lie to us about her?/i iWhy did he not tell us sooner, if he is so committed to this family?/i   
  
As if she had read her mind, Prue spoke up, her words sombre. "Leo couldn't have told us about Paige, Piper. They literally forbade him entirely from talking about her, or he would be taken away from us, from you. You know he couldn't have done that Piper, it would've killed both of you, like being seperated right now." Her words could explain anything; make any pain disappear, of a cut elbow or grazed knee, even a broken heart.   
  
"Paige is a good person Piper. I know our childhood was never easy, and at best hard. But at least we knew them, sweetie. At least we had Mom for a little bit, be it just a couple of years for you. Paige never did anything wrong, yet she's been punished her whole life but never knowing us, never meeting us. That's not her fault or Leo's; it's just fate, sweetie, you know that." Prue reached across, her hand cupping Piper's cheek, just as it had the day she said goodbye. Piper's heart leapt, skin tingling, at the familiar feeling, that soft touch, those fingers pressing ever so gently into her skin. She closed her eyes and gently breathed out, her body shaking with exhaustion, a thousand nights lain awake, her mind too alert to ever fall asleep without dreaming of turmoil, words she wanted to forget swimming in her head.   
  
"I'm right here for you. I'm watching you, both of you, just like I always did; you just can't see me. Remember that, always. But you need to let her know you, Piper. She's our sister, she needs you as much as I think you need her, and not just for the power of three." Prue watched Piper intently, shadows from the sun playing off her face, her eyes flickering as she processed information. "You'd never forgive yourself if you didn't just meet her, get to know her. I know you, Piper, better than I know anyone. You'd regret it forever, just like Mom regretted giving her away."  
  
Piper nodded slightly, her hand still firmly grasping Prue's, gazing off into the distance where she could see a childhood so different from her own, where she had three sisters. It was nice, a pleasant place to be, she felt safe there, looked after by Prue and a mentor for Phoebe and Paige. She drew herself slowly back to reality, took a deep breath and answered Prue's concerned gaze. "Okay. But what about you? Are you gonna be okay?"  
  
Prue smiled, a small sad smile, tinged with the knowledge that she would no longer have the two people she loved most in the world around her all day. "I'm okay, kiddo. I've got Mom and Grams and Andy up here, we're fine. My only regret is that I won't get to be anyone's Auntie Prue." Prue whispered over tears. "But if you and Phoebe are happy, I'm happy. Okay? You need to go speak to Leo, and I need to be go where I have to go." she murmered sadly as Piper's arms engulfed her.  
  
"I love you, Prue. So much. Please come back as soon as you can, okay?" She stroked her sister's hair, desperate not to let her go, knowing she would have to. Knowing in her heart of hearts that Prue had her own place to go to, as Piper had hers. Separated by life, separated by death, the two sisters hung to each other.  
  
"I love you too. Go get Leo, honey, go meet Paige. I'm right here, whenever you need me. I can hear you, even if you can't see or hear me, okay?" Her arms held Piper to her, as though they were kids again and she had had a nightmare.  
  
Piper nodded as the golden orbs engulfed Prue, taking her back up to the heavens where she now belonged. Smiling beneath the beautiful glow of gold, bands of light racing across her body, their last glimpse of each other was memerised forever; Piper sitting cross legged, eyes shining, mouth in a small, sad smile. Prue's face lit up in gold, her eyes sad at leaving but happy in the knowledge that both her isters would be okay without her.   
  
Then suddenly Piper was alone again, the gentle sunlight flickering through the gap in the undrawn curtains. She got up, pulled her hair from her eyes, and drew them back, the golden sunshine hitting her with all it's glory, bright and warming her deadened skin.   
  
And as she drew the photograph from her pocket, she knew exactly what she had to do next.  
  
center***/center  
  
Her legs crossed under her, Piper sat on a wicker chair in the sunroom, feeling calmer than she had for over a month. She no longer needed to cry for Prue; her goodbyes and I love you's were said, she had made peace with both her sister and herself. Her mind was clear from worry, from grief or hurt, focused entirely on what she most needed right now; her husband, his strong arms around her, his lips pressing kisses to her hair, her neck, her lips. Piper closed her eyes, took a deep breath and silently used their never-ending connection to call him.  
  
iLeo.... Leo I need you. We need to talk, I love you, please come to me..../i  
  
She could see the drops of light cascading before her eyes before she even opened them, dots of light colouring the backs of her lids as the glow of the orbs penetrated them. Slowly, one she was sure he was there, once she could hear the sweet lulling of his breath, Piper's eyes cracked open, meeting his. Her heart thumped in her chest as soon as she saw that vivid green, the man she loved so much before her very eyes..... it seemed unreal.  
  
"Leo.." she breathed. His mind flickered, racing, too many thoughts cluttering it. His heart collided with his rib cage, wanting to jump out and run to hers, so eager he was to sweep her up in his arms and never stop holding her. Torn apart for so long, every second, a part of his mind on her. iWhere was she?/i iWhat was she doing?/i iWas she hurting as he was?/i  
  
But as much as he longed too, he could not hold her yet. The barriers still rose above them, between them, blocking the other's view; neither were sure what the other one was thinking, let alone feeling. Slowly Leo took the seat opposite his wife's.  
  
"I missed you." It was a stated fact; the truth, letting him know that she had. He knew already; the way her eyes followed his very move, the desperate sound of her thoughts as she called him. A few bricks fell from the walls around each of them.  
  
Their eyes met, green matching brown, as a thousand times before. Two hearts surged, crying out for the touch of the other's skin, the smell of their hair, the gentle caress of their touch. But it was to much, too soon. Both knew that talking had to come before anything else. Piper spoke up.  
  
"I'm sorry for what I said. I know you couldn't have stopped Prue even if you had tried; she was always too determined for anything to get in her way, especially when it involved us. I know that, I knew that, I'm sorry. I was angry at everything, everyone, I ... I couldn't understand why she was torn from us like that." Her voice stood strong and firm in the room, a relaxed atmosphere, so foreign to the both of them. Leo watched and listened intently as Piper explained her outburst, hating the fact she had lost weight, that her hair had lost it's shine; because of him, because of Them.   
  
"It's okay, Piper. I shouldn't have taken her; I shouldn't have said the thing about Phoebe not being here. But Prue was strong enough to make her own decisions, and I knew she'd get down there somehow, and I was rather it was with me than a demon, or worse." He explained quietly, watching the squares of coloured light wash over Piper's face from the stained glass windows; orange and green and pink dancing and twinkling.   
  
"I know that now. I'm sorry; I never meant what I said. At least not about Prue." Her face became sombre, Leo's concerned. "I know They wouldn't let you tell us about Paige; Prue told me what they'd have done." Leo's eyes widened, but he knew the powers They had, and did not question Piper as she sat, still cross legged, wearing loose beige trousers and a dark brown rollneck. "So you did the right thing, in the end. This month has taught me that; I need you near me, Leo. I fall apart at the thought that I've lost you, that I won't be near you. But They have too much control over you, too much say in where you are and what you do and don't say. They weren't right to keep her from us, or to take her from Mom in the first place." She swallowed and ran her tongue nervously over her lips, saliva wetting them and making them shine in the light.   
  
Bricks tumbled with each word either said, falling and colliding with the floor, smashed to a thousand pieces by the bond they shared as soulmates. By the love they shared, by their willingness to get back to what they had. Leo ventured from his seat, walking slowly towards Piper, watching her reaction. She nodded reassuringly, watching his eyes, and he sat down beside her, mere inches separating their bodies.  
  
"I know, They have too much say in this marriage. If you don't wake to my arm around you, it's because They have me off somewhere, and I hate that. I hate knowing you're waking cold and lonely, no good morning kiss or hug. I want to be the husband who's always there whether you need me or not." He hesitantly took her hand in his own, his skin tingling at the feel of hers. Shivers ran down her spine, his warm, clammy skin never more welcome. Brown stared into green, green was mesmerised by her face, her eyes, the delightful feel of her skin beneath his.  
  
For a moment Leo was speechless, the words literally not forming, too amazed by Piper's closeness, loving the feel of her breath on him; shallow, anxious breaths. Both grinned and he continued. "P...Paige has the power to heal, Piper. She's really good at it, I've... I've been training her." Leo watched her reaction cautiously. Piper nodded; iIt's okay./i   
  
"What would you say if in a few months, I could clip my wings?" He questioned softly, watching his wife's face. She gasped, gaped, her hand drawn away from his only so she could slap both to her mouth in shock. Now it was Piper's turn to be speechless, as his words settled on her mind, bringing a thousand possibilities to light.  
  
"What....but...how... .....? she trailed off, until she met his eyes, and immediately focused. "You..... you could do that? Would do that?"  
  
Leo took both her hands in his own, smiling softly at her shocked expression. "Piper, you went into the future. You saw what had happened. I don't want that to happen, I don't ever want to be without you ever again. I know I enjoy my job; I really do. I can help people, guide them, save the. But I need to save myself first. And now we have that possibility more open to us, because Paige has the power to heal."  
  
He watched Piper's face change from shock into extreme happiness, the smile he had missed more than anything spreading from her lips to her eyes, so they crinkled at the corners, brown shining, gleaming, alive and happy. "I want to be a proper husband, who wraps his arms about you at night, who's there to raise his kids and take them to dancing lessons and ball games, to see their first steps and hear their first words. I loved my job. But I love you more, more than anything. And I never want to go through this last month ever again." He smiled, reaching up to trail his fingers over her face, tracing her eyes, her nose, her lips.   
  
A small cry left her lips as tiny, silent tears of happiness ran from her eyes. They had been through so much; a death, a funeral, a betrayal. But still, as ever, they found their ways back to each other, forgiving and understanding, breaking down barriers, building stronger bonds.   
  
"Leo, hold me..." she stated simply through tears and smiles. Then his arms were around her, blocking out the pain of the last month, and they were back, Piper and Leo; inseparable. She could smell his aftershave, still damp on his skin, his strong arms wrapped tightly around her, every inch of him missed for so long.   
  
He held her tightly, the nicest feeling in the world, of her head resting on her shoulder, the light smell of her hair tickling his nose. Elation ran the length of his body, and he whispered the words he had longed to for so long.  
  
"I love you."  
  
"I love you too."  
  
The rain outside had stopped, heaven's tears dried as the two held each other for hours on end. A bright rainbow filled the sky, sparks of colour from the eyes of the gods themselves.  
  
center***/center  
  
The sun was high in the cloudless sky, a perfect combination of gorgeous azure blue and sparkling yellow. Piper walked arm in arm through Golden Gate Park with Phoebe, both dressed in light summer dresses, the temperature into the high nineties. Piper's hair flew out behind her, caught and gently teased by the warm breeze, fluid liquid brown. The sisters huddled together despite the overwhelming warmth, clinging to each other for support in what would be a hard task.  
  
A few metres ahead of them the path curved, turning a corner. Piper took a deep breath, meeting Phoebe's eyes, small, nervous smiles excahnged. Each glanced at their watch; twelve noon exactly, two gold hands pointing directly upwards, catching the sun and glinting.   
  
From around the corner two figures emerged, one blonde, one reddish-brunette. One looking as nervous as Piper felt, the other looking to her in concern. She nodded reassuringly, a small smile on her lips, telling Leo she was okay. The two parties regarded each other, the laughter of nearby children drowned out by the frantic nervous thundering of hearts.  
  
Phoebe squeezed Piper's hands, the two exchanging looks of igood luck/i and iI love you./i Slowly they parted as Phoebe moved to meet her little sister. They each edged slowly, gradually, to the middle of Piper and Leo, and Phoebe smiled welcomingly as she and Paige embraced, Paige's blue eyes sparkling before Phoebe's brown as the two exchanged hesitant hello's.   
  
Eventually the two parted, and Piper's heart beagn to race again, her eyes flickering, suddenly too nervous to meet her youngest sister. She felt like running, feet pounding away from this new, frightening reality. Paige smiled, mere metres away, long red hair gleaming in the pure sunlight. And it scared Piper more than any demon or warlock she had ever met.  
  
iShe's our sister, she needs you as much as I think you need her../i Piper exhaled deeply, Prue's words whispering down the wind. iShe's here, watching. She's okay..../i Slowly Piper moved forward, each step a challenge, nearing the sister she was about to meet twenty two years too late. She memerised the unfamiliar face; bright blue eyes, her nother's nose and lips, gorgeous reddish brown hair flowing down her back, and relaxed immediately.   
  
Suddenly the two were mere inches apart, each invisbly tracing the other's face. Piper calmed down further as Paige's words filled the air.  
  
"Hi Piper." She smiled slightly, nervously. Piper swallowed and smiled back, all worries suddenly gone from her mind, Prue's words still echoing in her ears.   
  
"Hi Paige." The two embraced warmly, Piper closing her eyes as the summer breeze washed over her skin, Paige's sweet smelling hair blowing across her face. And she could feel Prue's approving smile from the heavens, smiling and content that all her little sisters would be okay.  
  
Fin.   
  



End file.
